I won’t bog you down you with the details of my work, but suffice it to say it has been a busy week. I came home today wanting only to snuggle up in some pj’s and relax….the weekend has other plans for me though. I’m grateful for friends and family to see and events to go to of course, but all I can think about right now is sitting in a nice hot tub with a glass of yummy eggnog.
My bet friend and her husband are moving this weekend into their new Townhouse…is it natural to be just a little bit jealous? I am so happy for them, they have worked hard and saved so they could buy a place of their own, I just wish we were at a place we could do the same.
Someone wrote recently about self-revelations and it made me think about my own. I think my biggest is that I don’t know what I want until I see someone else who has it. This can be anything, shoes, books, food, houses, or even marriage and babies. How can I be so easily swayed and influenced? Don’t I have any confidence in God’s plans for my life? It’s not that I want what I can’t have, its that I don’t know that I want it until I see how great it is when someone else has it. My new resolution is to not want other people’s things…sounds elementary I know, but sometimes I need a reminder. I wish I could just be happy for others when good things happen and not start thinking about how I don’t have whatever that may be. And then sometimes, which is really scary, I start wanting that thing that they have and suddenly realize that it would be really bad if I did have it, maybe I’m not ready, maybe I haven’t thought through all the implications. I just can’t see the truth of the situation and trust that God’s plan for my life is infinitely better than any plans I try to make. And then the realization hits and I feel foolish and selfish and undeserving of all the blessings that God has given me.
